Twenty seventeen

new years resolution

2017. It's finally here. The seemingly elusive number that has been tagged onto the end of my name for the last 4 years. Khadijah Haji, 17A. My identity. My goal. My hope. So many things the number 17 has held for me, and will forever hold. It's here. 

I don't know how I feel about resolutions. On one hand, the new year brings with it a clean slate. However, the expectation to start fresh, make new goals and follow-through on them can be overwhelming. So which one is it then? At its core, the word resolution means to decide whether or not to do something. To solve. When we sit to make our "resolutions", we are basically saying that we need to resolve our doings of the past year. That this year, we will do it better. As if what we did last year was wrong. So off we go, writing our resolutions. And just like that we dust off our hands and go about our new year as if by writing it down, we have changed our fate. 

Now, I don't mean to say that none of us follow through. Yes, we all have the desire to change. However, I believe that the reason a lot of new years resolutions remain "unresolved" is because of the expectation we attach to them. We expect that change will come simply because it is a new year. We also expect that we have to complete those resolutions. The motivation behind our resolutions starts to become a negative force rather than a push of inspiration. The drive is: "I better do this because I said I would do better", rather than: "I am doing this because I truly want to".  We then start to measure each day's result as a benchmark of how the whole year is going. Each time we fall, we think we are losing sight of our goal. Suddenly, we have gone through another year thinking that we never accomplished our new years resolutions. When in fact, we did.

Here is how I see it. A new year is just that. It is a new year. Just as today is a new day. And so is tomorrow. And this week is a new week. This moment is a new moment. The beauty of life is that it is always handing you a clean slate. It all lies in your perspective. There is a lot of power in a new year. It is new. It is filled with opportunity and hope. So set your goals. Claim your desires. But realize that these are not expectations. These are simply desires. Simply a way for you to get to decide on the direction you want to take. Make those plans and be ok if you don't follow through.

The year isn't going to miraculously be everything you say you want it to be. Life has an interesting way of giving you what you need when you are ready for it. Realize that each new day is an opportunity for you to start over. Each decision you make is a chance for you to make those changes that you have always hoped for. Just as one moment was 2016 and the next was 2017, each new moment is always an opportunity to start fresh. Didn't take your vitamins yesterday? Take them today. Want to sleep earlier? Start tonight. Or you know what? Be a rebel and start tomorrow. Want to hit the gym more, but already missed a whole week? Well guess what, there's a whole new week coming up. You catch my drift right? Don't focus on what you aren't doing, and start to celebrate each moment you live that gets you closer to your truth.

For this new year and new moment, I choose to live with grace and humility. And yes, to take my vitamins everyday and sleep earlier and get my butt to the gym. But really, I already know that I won't be perfect at those things. And I don't expect to. There are many beautiful moments coming up for me. Finishing school. Walking the stage. Becoming a doctor. Finding my new path. Shedding my identity as a student in the class of 17A and entering the real world. So for me, all I hope is that I will continue to believe in the magic of each moment. And I hope that you will too.

Wishing you all a beautiful, wonderful and graceful 2017. I'm rooting for you. 

The possibilities are endless.

The possibilities are endless.